Happy mothers Day

We have had a rough year at our house this year financially. We are constantly struggling to make ends meet. It is very stressful to say the least! I find myself yelling and not being the mother I know I should be to my children. I put my faith in god that things will work out for the better. Tonight is one of those stressful nights. I am not going to go into detail about why, We have no money for a mothers day gift for me. So while lots of my friends will be going to spas or lunch or getting nice things I will not get any of that. But you know what that is ok, because I would not be a mom without the 3 best presents in the world and so I will be spending the day with the three best miracles in the world. It took me awhile to come to this place. For those of you that do not know I had 6 pregnancies which resulted in only three children. my son was the third pregnancy with 2 miscarriages before him. He was a very difficult pregnancy which resulted in a life flight trip for me while he was still inside me to a hospital an hour away. For fourteen days I stayed in that hospital on bedrest and my husband lived an hour away and drove almost every night after work to be with me and then drove back home. It was a very stressful time and I cried and was scared but we made it through. And my baby boy made it through even though he was born 5 1/2 weeks early and had a 2 week hospital stay. Later when he was diagnosed with autism it was another arewegoing to make it through this moment? Yes we made it through. My husband made a job change and I decided to quit my job to be home with my son for awhile. We went without health insurance for awhile and our hopes of having another baby was put on hold even longer. When we finally did get health insurance again and decided to try for that baby it happened only to the realization that once again something was wrong. That something turned out to be an ectopic pregnancy that I had to take the cancer drug methotrexate to diminish. This was also a very stressful and disheartening time. It is very hard to lose a pregnancy no matter how far along you are your heart aches. I was told to wait at least 6 months. The following december we had our baby girl... she was almost a c section. a breech baby that turned at the last minute. Aaron was done... I wasn't ;) I won.2 1/2 years later we had our last baby girl. She was a gestational diabetes baby. I may get frustrated and angry and short with my kids but a day does not go by that I would not give my life for them. I love them all and I am so very proud of every accomplishment they make. So please forgive me god for not always being the best mom.but the fact of the matter is I always love my kids and there is nothing I would not do for them. And I leave you with this a poem for moms. "Sometimes when you sleep, into your room I want to creep and kiss your little nose and look at your little toes. You are a miracle to me, one that I had always dreamed. I love you like you will never know and each day more it grows and grows. " Ok that was my odd attempt at poetry :) like or leave it.... but it is how I feel. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY :)